I realized I need to quit laziness. I need to quit inactivity. I always said i need to start exercising or something along those lines, but in reality its quitting inactivity. This really changes the way I look at it. Starting for some reason is harder than quitting for me. I cant seem to get out of bed in the morning if I have nothing to do. But I DO have something to do…movement. Stretch, (yoga), read, write, mediate. Same old same old with me. I cant seem to accomplish these things. I used to blame my weed addiction, but im sober now, well only 6 weeks sober, but still sober! Am I being too hard on myself? most likely. I am jobless and broke. well not even jobless. I still work 10 hours a week for my other job up north, but I still consider that not enough, because its not. 10 hours a week isnt anything. its 100/week. I cant live on that. I barely can fed myself, my dog and get gas on that. I hate being in society sometimes. Why does it have to be so hard? Why cant i figure out ?
The inertia of life keeps me down and Ive yet to find a way out.