New Moon Jan 2018

  1. Last year I was really good at doing intentions for the new moons and following along. I always got what I asked for but didn’t usually do what I intended. I petered off toward the end of the year and didn’t even do a New Years intention. I really fell off. But today I was reminded of a simple practice of writing 10 things you intend for the new moon cycle.

1. Smoke less weed. I originally had wanted to do cold turkey and stop today. I went all day and tried to take magnesium to help calm me naturally and it acted the opposite. It made me more anxious, so I smoked weed. Heavy smoker who is a tad on a manic side with no meds probably shouldn’t stop cold turkey.

2. Eat 5 servings of fruit a week. I’m looking forward to this one! I want to exceed it honestly.

3. Eat more protein shakes! I have so many allergies now that it’s hard to know what to eat, so smoothies is a good plan.

4. Drink 64 ounces of water a day! Duh.

5. Meditate everyday

6. Make a daily gratitude list. I feel like this mixed with the meditation will get me back to a place of positivity.

7. Make peace with the hate in my heart. This one is gonna be big. I have lots of hate and I dislike it! I want to find peace. Hoping the gratitude helps!

8. Talk to your family more. Make it a daily text or chat to keep in better touch.

9. Go to the beach everyday. I am lucky enough to live next to the ocean. I need to go there every single day even if for a minute! Great place to do my gratitude list!

10. Be open to new experiences! I feel stuck in my ways lately and want to be free! So here is to saying yes more than no!

What’s on your list?

Three little gems found in the rubble.

I wrote these two poems a few weeks ago while in Portland, Oregon. They really capture how I was feeling. One so hopeful and one so hopeless. Quite the dichotomy. Its exactly how I felt. Torn between happiness and despair. That is all over now. Now its time to sift through the rubble and see what gems I can find to help me on my current journey.

PAL BLU

The faint blue light of the sun rising to greet us with a new day drapes my room in my emotion. How can the sun project exactly what I’m feeling yet be so inspiring?

I need a hug.

I need a tree to wrap its branches around me and release this mess that swirls around my head like a whirlpool.
I miss you.
Will you ever come back to me?
Will my words be taken how I mean them?
Do you still want me?
The dawn of a new day does not bring these answers but it does kill yesterday’s fears.
GRAVEYARD DAYDREAMS
She lived amongst the dead

She loved amongst the dead.
She ran with the ghosts
They taught her about life and how to live
Do not waste a minute
They all wish they could be her
You are their hero
The queen rides again
The locomotive won’t stop anytime soon so enjoy it
Live live live!
Love love love
Move move move
amongst the dead
Learn from their perfection,
their failure
and
ultimate end.
GIRL
Grow roots in yourself and let your soul blossom is all you can do now.
go do it girl
step to it girl
let it go girl
live it up girl
respect the girl
release it all girl

Magic Oblivion

Lack of sleep brought these poems to me. I hope you enjoy them.

1.

Split open like a coconut ripped from a tree

oozing liquid that was thought to no longer exist

pooling onto the floor left for dead.

Answers the universe refuse to give.

Space time continuum

falling back into place.

Left on the side of the road alone and frightened

you’ve been here before, but its not the same

2.

Lost in a sea of lies, thighs and spies

we synthesize the track of bliss

to end no longer with a kiss

years you may have to miss

will no longer exist

3.

The sweet scent of woman, man and sea

coalesced under the birds screaming from above

danger awaits, but is lovingly placed on the shelf

locked up for no one but essence of infactuation

4.

Collide on the skin with every note

Abend the twists and breaks

Experience mystical moxie exchanged on a whim

to be taken to an assent by a lover

who rewards with acumen so earnestly

Untitled 1

The excitement hits your chest like a sledgehammer breaking up concrete.

Your heart is pounding like a rabbit scratching its ear

Fear tries to scream at you to stop, urges you to turn around

You choose to ignore it.

You must see this through, you’ve gone this far,

there is no turning back.

Time to make the leap

Jump! Go for it! You can do it! You’re number 1!

Then comes the calm…

Everything feels okay

There is no more pounding heart

no more clammy hands

no more fear screaming in the background.

There is only SILENCE.

It drapes the room.

The awkwardness drapes the audience, shhhhhhhhh!

Congratulations, you did it.

Now please turn off your phone and enjoy the movie.

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