Same as it ever was..

I was scanning the internet and saw some shows that are coming up in the Los Angeles area and I got excited about a few bands that are playing reunion shows, etc. This thought is exciting, yet disappointing. I want to be excited to go see bands I haven’t seen since I was in my younger days, but I can’t. This idea seems very silly to me, and I am sure to you as well. Why on earth wouldnt I want to hear music live again from bands I love? Its because its not the same. Nothing is the same as it was 10 years ago, or even 2 days ago. We are ever evolving and our tastes are a large part of that. If I go see a band that I spent a large majority of my 20s going to see, now in my 30s will it be the same? Of course not. It might even be sad to see them older trying to play with the same energy as they had 10 years ago. Trying to keep up with the influx of new listeners eager to hear their words sang live. Even worse I start to think about who will be in attendance. It will surely be a mix of people like me, and younger versions of me and my friends.  Its the evolution of growing up. We get older and think we are still young, until we see the younger versions of ourselves running around town. 

I was flipping through some random music blog and saw pictures from a DJ night, and I swore I knew those people. Hey I know you! You are the same girl I used to see go to the bathroom every 5 minutes to do coke, then come out and dance your ass off! Hey you! The hipster who’s too cool and stands around and has everyone come to you! Or you, yeah you, the dude with the huge beard and tight shirt and even tighter jeans discussing the government and ecological improvements.  Let me just say none of this is a diss, nor is it bad, it just is, and its weird.

Is this just so crazy to me because of where I came from? The society I grew up in? Does technology and having access to the internet and keeping up with people and groups keep everyone being the same? For example older generations blogging and putting up pictures of themselves and their friends, then the younger generation sees those things and becomes that. Its a cycle for sure, and I am sure its happened for hundreds of years in some way, but I feel my generation is different. I feel with all access it keeps us all the same, which in turn is what my generation is trying to avoid. We all want to be individuals and unique, but some how all end up looking and being the same. 

“Time saves no time for no one”-Melissa Culbertson 2012

From Philly to Cali, Cali to Philly...

Tonight I was driving through Hollywood and my iPhone was cruising through shuffle. I chilled through a few old songs; Neil Young’s ‘Harvest’, The Faint’s ‘Agenda Suicide’ and then outta nowhere Freeway’s ‘All My Life’ came on. I got excited, turned my stereo all the way up and drove through Hollywood rapping Freeway. I felt like I was 23 again driving around Philly with my girlfriends smoking blunts and just loving life.

This got me thinking about growing up and how odd it really is. I am 33 years old, ten years have passed since I was that girl in Philly, but somehow I still feel like her at times. I now really cherish those moments when the young version of myself pops her head out and has fun for a few minutes, or even an evening. When you get older things change. When you used to be able to go out at 11 and dance your ass off, drink an overwhelming amount of alcohol,  smoke blunts, then go to work the next day. I could never image doing so, nor would I want to, but that girl is there, somewhere.

What I’m getting at is that no matter how much we change, we still are us. Those little quirks still exist and sometimes we just need to let them out, just be a kid again. Kids just live presently. They just deal with life as it comes to them. There is no thinking about bills, or jobs, or family, its about now. The most I ever cared about was; where we all my friends were meeting and what time. Anything else was just a bonus.

I appreciate the wisdom and many valuable lessons I’ve learned over the years, but fuck it. Sometimes you just gotta turn the radio up and rap like a white girl.

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